Taking ownership of your mistakes-
You’re going to fail. Your gonna fail and f*ck up lots in this life. That’s just how it is. But if you can take ownership and responsibility for your mistakes- and learn your lesson from them- then you are on the road to healing.
If we can acknowledge our errors and take the time to look into why we did that behavior then there is an opportunity for growth, transformation and learning. If we pretend it didn’t happen or blame someone else- then we will simply repeat the behavior again. The mistake is there to teach us. It is an opportunity for growth.
“The only real mistake is the one in which we learn nothing” Henry Ford
I got pulled over by a cop a few months ago while driving along the coast to the surf break. He flashed his lights, I slowed down and pulled off to the side of the road and rolled down my window. The conversation went something like this. . .
“Do you know how fast you were going?”
“I’m sorry officer, I think I was going around 55 in a 45. I should have been going slower and paying attention to my speed. I’m sorry. I see how it is not safe to be speeding here with the other cars, and bikers that use this road.”
“Wow. You know what, you’re the first person to say something like the in a Long time (about 10 years). Usually when I pull people over they are trying to talk their way out of it. They blame it on the other people, or on the car or the signs- they don’t even acknowledge that they were speeding. They deny, avoid, lie, and blame. Thank you for being honest with me. I’m just going to give you a warning this time because you knew how fast you were going. But please remember to slow down and stay within the speed limit.”
“Thank you, officer. That is very kind of you. I will make sure to stay within the speed limit from now on.”
When you f*ck up- can you acknowledge it and RE-commit yourself to doing better? That’s all a mistake is there for. It is there to teach you so that you can improve and be better next time. It’s really not a big deal. It is about recommitting to do the right thing. Over and over and over in our life- in every month, in every week and in every single day- we are given the opportunity to commit, and recommit to how we want to live our lives.
Don’t let yourself get caught up in feeling bad for too long about making a mistake- because you’re going to make plenty of them. Use them as an opportunity for growth. What was the lesson that the mistake was bringing to you? Can you learn that lesson? Can you give thanks for the mistake as a teacher for you? Can you apologize and thank those who you may have caused harm to in order for you to learn this lesson? And then recommit yourself to better action.
Love,
ali
“Failure is a great teacher. And if you are open to it, every mistake has a lesson to offer.” -Oprah
photo: Biel Morro